Reality Sucks

its a bad bad world
with tough times prevailing hard

i want dreams galore
to come true and right

why don't things happen this way?
why's there so much dismay?

i want it all perfect
a utopia bright and happy

i hate walking alone
wish you were by my side

u say those hateful words
which don't feel alright

where did i go wrong?
what didn't i do right?

why are spats so common
on special and happy days?

why not build some memories
click pics and frame them on the walls?

i slog hard for us
sometimes day and night

still there is ungratefulness
sometimes way too much to handle

yet i try to bind and gel
and put back all pieces together

Feeling hurt

Why do i write poetry when I am low?
I don't know
may be just may be some strong feelings are taking toll
that's why for the first time in months, i feel badly hurt

now i realize that i mean nothing at all
to people and places who were my all
they paint me black
say hurtful words
yet i wan't 'em back in my world
i don't know how long this is gonna last
at this behavior, i am aghast

never expected to see this day so soon
so i am gloomy this night, even if its a full moon.

sob! sob! sob!

yea yea whatever.. just felt like writing so wrote it... i aint sad or anything. i care a fig about the world. i am selfish and i love myself. i am gonna be happy and do as i wish from now on.

so all of ya all.... just let me be and don't bug me ever again!

I reached 172m in xmas. Check out how far you go: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.fingersoft.hillclimb

Still alone, fore ever alone...

"We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we're not alone." - Orson

Am I a loner deep down within? I dont know.

I was wounded within, from some past blows.

You took my hand and promised to show

happy days and golden glows.

I used to be a happy girl, 'twas long ago

but now with misery I overflow. 

The seeds of memories now that i try to sow,

do grow but real slow.

The pain keeps moving to and fro. 

All this seems like a blow

punching through my heart, just so.

"Boulevard Of Broken Dreams" GREEN DAY

I walk a lonely road

The only one that I have ever known
Don't know where it goes
But it's home to me and I walk alone

I walk this empty street
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Where the city sleeps
And I'm the only one and I walk alone

I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone up there will find me
'til then I walk alone

Ah-ah, ah-ah, ah-ah, aaah-ah,
Ah-ah, ah-ah, ah-ah

I'm walking down the line

That divides me somewhere in my mind
On the border line
Of the edge and where I walk alone

Read between the lines
What's fucked up and everything's alright
Check my vital signs
To know I'm still alive and I walk alone

I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk alone
I walk a...
My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone up there will find me
'til then I walk alone

Ah-ah, ah-ah, ah-ah, aaah-ah
Ah-ah, ah-ah

I walk alone
I walk a...

I walk this empty street
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams
When the city sleeps
And I'm the only one and I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone up there will find me
'til then I walk alone...


Soothing song for tough times... listening to this one now....

Happy Janmashtami!

Baby at 8 months
She is crawling
Eating her solids
Moving around d house
Exploring stuff
Tearing papers
Responding to hr name whn called out.. Wd a head turn
Is going thru separation anxiety whn i leave d room evn fr a sec
Hates hr toys n loves mobile phones n remotes
Loves chocolate pieces
Has had her share of cold attacks n flus.
Loves lights
Has been vaccinated on time
D only prob is that she is underweight... At 7kilos .. She is as active as any othr baby hr age. Ideally she shuda been 8 kilos or more. Ths s wt bothers me. I did sm research on d net n came to knw tht babies tend to get stuck at one weight during 6-9 mnths n thn hv a suddn growth spurt. Furthermore the growth spurts vary in every baby.

Here r a few pics o my lil lady love.

Nobody understands me...

The 26 year old me is growing up fast
the teenager in me is burning and charred
i feel the vibe is faint and pain crawling in
and my fervor to stand out is no more in
i write this with a lot of writhe
that's eating up my self from within

They say that i am a mistake
and all i do is take take take
plus my work is all messy and late
and excuses are all that i can make

but i m trying hard to avoid the stake
by working hard day in and out
to satisfy the needs of everyone
and to live up to needs before they are gone

in the process i forget myself
am i selfish? i dont know
but from within i feel hollow
cz i have nothing in store for my soul
and no time to get a hold
of my mind, and rare emotional flows

no one cares, no one even knows
how hard i strive to do
things that they want fast and perfectly too

but all i ask for is a little gratitude
some time off from this buzzing life
a few hours of leisure, which now is a luxury

i think thts too much to ask for
cz m supposed to stand all alone
as tough as a stone
a lone fighter in the marital zone...